How do you make friends? Do you pick your friends, or do your friends pick you? It doesn't seem like much of a difference, but I think answering that question can help shape who you are. I am one who waits to be picked. That sounds conceited, but really it's because I'm not confident enough to initiate. I wait to see who comes to me.
I went to a small private school until 8th grade. In our graduating class, there were only 5 girls- not much of a pool to choose from. I assumed if one of the girls wanted to be my friend it was because- don't laugh- I had long hair, or got good grades. Everything I felt was based on conditions, not just because they liked me.
Even now as an adult, I'll meet a potential friend and the first thing to run through my head is that they don't have time or room in their life for me. I sabotage potential friendships in an effort to not be rejected. I know we were made for relationship, but why is it so hard for that to sink in?
I feel like I have to convince someone that I am a good person to be friends with. In reality, I need to convince myself that I'm worth the effort.
I love you, Trish! You are one of the most thoughtful people I know. People would be lucky and blessed to have you as a friend (like I am!). :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you asked me over to your library table those many years ago! Where would I be without MY Jeanie? :)
ReplyDeleteI don't even know what to write about that, Tershess. But I am the same way..look at how we ended up meeting. It wasn't of our own free wills, now was it?
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